My head feels like I've been practicing headspins all day, but I just realized I've only been carrying floorboards. Same amount of pain with no progress. FML

  • Anonymous over 6 years ago Reply

    COCK

  • Anonymous over 6 years ago Reply

    RECTAL PROLAPSE

The other PFML site is down. We have to use this one. FML

  • Anonymous over 6 years ago Reply

    PENIS

Triumph created a black squirrel brew and barrel tapping on 10/15 at 6pm - I just started dating the hostess who can get me in the party - MLIAWESOME

  • Anonymous over 6 years ago Reply

    SCHLONG

I can't stand "The Dilettante" on the other PrincetonFML site. Can we all switch over to this one without telling him? FHL

  • Calling it now almost 7 years ago Reply

    person who disliked this is The Dilettante

  • Anonymous over 6 years ago Reply

    TITTIES

Why can't I get my shit together? FML

  • http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_stool_scale almost 7 years ago Reply

    Where are you on the Bristol stool scale?

B7e

Taking classes outside of my department. Why? FML

I got in because I am African American... MLIG.

  • Anonymous almost 7 years ago Reply

    Cockety cock cock penis penis cock
    Dongety dong dong penis penis dong
    Why oh why is my cock so long
    why do I penetrate your pussy so strong
    I fuck you I fuck you I fuck you I do
    My doinker is stronger than a pile of poo
    I jizz up your ass like a snake in the grass
    My johnson fucks your kitty like a cock in the ass

    • I got this reference almost 7 years ago Reply

      Hamlet, right?

      • Anonymous almost 7 years ago Reply

        Cockety cock cock doinker doinker cock!

    • wow almost 7 years ago Reply

      wow

It's a bitch sitting in class, then prof asks me to stand and quote a passage from my paper, only to smell my breath, which reeks of booze @ 10:00am. FMHungoverL.

Calling it now... Keyless locks are going to be a bitch after a night at the Street. FOL

  • '14 almost 7 years ago Reply

    true - i already have trouble punching the right number

  • sadf almost 7 years ago Reply

    sdf

  • Anonymous almost 7 years ago Reply

    cock, penis, doinker, dong, groin

Hatersgonnahate

Freshman talking about me behind my back. Don't even care.

  • Anonymous almost 7 years ago Reply

    So fucking brave.

This site is dead. FYL whoever made it.

Girls all tell me I'm a "nice guy." FML

Back from Prison in Beijing. Can no longer go to clubs - no fake ID. FML

All my friends graduated. FML

It's almost time to go back to Princeton! OLAG

  • Anonymous almost 7 years ago Reply

    eh

I have absolutely nothing going for me. FML

  • Tony Hayward almost 7 years ago Reply

    THAT BOYPUSSY has absolutely nothing going for POUND. FML

  • Penis cock penis almost 7 years ago Reply

    Cock penis cock

  • Where do you go to school? almost 7 years ago Reply

    Cornell?

What am I doing with my life? FML

  • Tony Hayward almost 7 years ago Reply

    What you SHOULD be doing is POUNDING THAT BOYPUSSY.

  • Cock Cock cock almost 7 years ago Reply

    penis penis penis

I hate that the day after I masturbate I can still smell my vagina on my fingers as if I need to be reminded of my perpetual loneliness and sexual frustration. FML

  • confused almost 7 years ago Reply

    this is depressing but turned me on at the same time

  • Sketchy GS almost 7 years ago Reply

    I'll help you out with that... then the smell of your vagina will be on MY fingers... and I definitely won't be complaining about it :D :D :D :-*

  • Double Pendulum almost 7 years ago Reply

    Yeah, same thing happens to me all the time. I like the smell though -- it reminds me of the awesome orgasm I had, not of my loneliness

I wish I had somebody to talk to. FML

I miss the active PFML community. FML

  • a about 7 years ago Reply

    looks like the other site has won out as the site of choice.

    • Yeah, about 7 years ago Reply

      but this one is soo much better though! GIFs! Texting!!

      • Agreed about 7 years ago Reply

        This website is the one that deserved to win.